My New Year’s resolution may work, or it may not. How do I create a high probability I will be successful?
There is a science to this. There are issues of personal psychology. And there are some spiritual principles that work. Finally, physical action directly causes results.
And how about willpower?
How do I resolve my resolutions? There is a path that works for the human bio-psycho-mental-belief system. A strategy.
Rule #1: Be calm, be reasonable. Grandiose declarations can be a quick upper, but result in a declining series of depressing thoughts, reinforcing the habit of failure. Lesson: small, doable goals which reinforce success and even build the ego. Small bites, swallow, repeat. We call this the salami-slice method.
Rule #2: No matter what, Start NOW with small doable goals, (like eating a salami). If the “whole salami” is too much, slice off a small piece of the goal that might take 10 minutes to accomplish. Or even just 10 seconds to think ABOUT IT. Think, plan, and do each of the 10 minutes of salami slices. SUCCESS! Repeat.
So much for the doing part. Now for the resolution itself. It matters.
Action A: Admit a dissatisfaction. Something you don’t like. Something you want to change, but can’t seem to do anything about.
Action B: Believe that it’s possible to succeed in making that change. Others have done it, so can I.
Action C: Clearly and definitively decide to do this. Or put it off . . .
Action D: Take stock. Write down the things you already have in your psyche: talents, skills, and knowledge. Write down your biggest challenge, and your easiest action.
Action E: Identify your best supporters and allies. And your opponents, present or past. (This may involve something as deep as family systems, fears, and re-surfacing angers, and even sexuality.) These issues must be written down. Keep in confidence if troublesome. Share with at least one trusted other if at all possible.
Action F: Write down the goal, and the path. Now go directly to Rule# 2. Repeat.
In a world of opinions, contrarianism, divisiveness, and bureaucracy – remember:
You are not to judge yourself harshly. Be in the now. Any guilt, shame, or loathing is in the past. The system that made you is the past. It is not all your fault but it is now your responsibility!
Darn. Your responsibility is now. What you do with your resolution IS now on you. Not the past you. Not them. You. Now. Take the responsibility and take 10 seconds.
See you next year.
And in 10 seconds.
December 30, 2024 @ 3:46 pm
We have talked about this many times. Appraisal licensing laws had a silent and erroneous assumption that anyone who is licensed is ethical.
What should have been required from the beginning was an Ethis Course. Many who came into appraisal were promoted by stories of how much money could be made. Most came for the money, not for Ethics.
And, Most have never had an Ethics course.
As far as goal setting, I got my early training in the Jaycee’s in their training course. We learned to divide into short term, intermediate, long term and life goals.
To be valid, a goal needs to be personal to the individual, measurable, attainable.
Sometimes long term goals, require short term and intermediate steps.
Again, thank you from all of us for your thoughtful article. And bless you for trying to help other appraisers.